Articles by Egon Sinclair
MTV's "16 And Pregnant: Afghanistan" Auditions Draw Several Thousand Applicants (03-30-2010)Church Fears Teens May Still Use Abortion As Birth Control Instead Of Birth Control (03-30-2010)
Armed Forces To Replace "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" With "I'm Not Gay, You're Gay" (03-29-2010)
Navy Only Allowing Women On Submarines If They Promise To "Totally Lezz Out" (03-29-2010)
Lackluster Men's Basketball Team Forces Sports Fan To Admit Women's Team Is "pretty Okay, I Guess" (03-29-2010)
Ag Major Stoked To Learn "Tiger Farming" Exactly What It Sounds Like (03-29-2010)
Hipster Worried No One Gets His Ironic Confederate Flag Tattoo (02-23-2010)
White Party-Goers Look To Sole Black Guy For Approval Every Time Rap Song Plays (02-09-2010)
PCP Is A Helluva Drug, Reports Wandering Duck With Your Mom's Face (02-09-2010)
All-American Basketball League Seeks To Restore Civility, Dignity Of All-White Sports (02-09-2010)
Senior Thinking Of Possibly Joining Peace Corps, Maybe (01-26-2010)
Multibillion Dollar Robotics Grant Rescinded After Prototype Fails The “Can You Fuck It?” Test (01-26-2010)
Creepy Effeminate Dude Still Has Halloween Photo As Profile Pic (01-26-2010)
Pagans Fear People Forgetting True Meaning Of Winter Solstice (12-15-2009)
Woman Learns Her Baby Worth Its Weight In Meth (12-15-2009)
Jesus Pissed His Birthday So Close To Christmas (12-15-2009)
Melting Rice 'Apparently Possible,' Reports Stoned Guy Making Rice (12-01-2009)
Irritated Boyfriend Ends Tense Two-Hour Standoff Between Local Woman, Spider (12-01-2009)
Creator Of Heartwarming, Holiday-Themed Commercial Goes Home To Empty House (12-01-2009)
'Paranormal Activity' Director To Flick Lights On And Off, Make Spooky Noises (12-01-2009)
Mother Unconvinced Son Is 'Just Holding It For Someone' In All 215 Facebook Photos (11-17-2009)
GM Pitches New Slogan “Cars: Fewer Minorities And Poor People Than The Bus” (11-03-2009)
Guy Writing Rape Story In Your Fiction Class Probably Means Business (10-06-2009)
Sports Writers' Union Admits To Writing Same Three Football Stories For Past 80 Years (10-06-2009)
Despite Extensive, Self-Made List Of “Han-Like” Qualities, “Star Wars” Fan Has Most In Common With C-3PO (09-22-2009)
Study: Misogyny Up Nationwide, According To Some Dumb Bitch (09-22-2009)
MLK’s Son Finally Judged By Content Of His Character, Wishes Dad Had Set Different Standard (09-22-2009)
Swine Flu Most Likely To Strike Students With Incredibly Improbable Number Of Dead Relatives (09-08-2009)
Rest Of 1970's To Play Next Year's State Fair (09-08-2009)
Area Man Can't Believe There Are Two Koreas (09-08-2009)
Boy Who Shot Father Recruited To ‘Halo 3’ Team (11-25-2008)
Plan To Enrich Self While Studying Abroad Falters When Student Realizes Other Countries Have Bars, Too (11-25-2008)
Failed High Five Shames Two, Ruins ‘Totally Awesome’ Moment (11-25-2008)
Ailing Economy Causes Unprecedented Woes For Rich Kids Pretending To Be Poor (11-25-2008)
No News Turns Out To Be Bad News (11-11-2008)
UNL LGBTQA To Assimilate Entire Alphabet By 2010 (10-28-2008)
Creative Writing Student’s Story Contains Happy Ending (10-28-2008)
Car Crashes Into Sheldon Window: Exhibit Opens To Rave Reviews (10-28-2008)
Poll: 67% Of Americans Prefer SNL Sara Palin (10-28-2008)
New Version Of Photoshop Still Unable To Make Steve Buscemi Remotely Attractive (10-14-2008)
12 Percent Of Americans Believe Barack Obama To Be Malevolent Space Lizard (09-30-2008)
Wedding Rings Worth More Than Institution Of Marriage (09-30-2008)
Prophets Jesus, Mohammed Faceoff In Holy Scriptures Sales Competition (02-19-2008)