For Immediate Release: Miley Cyrus Now 18

Story by Courtesy Photo 

| Published Nov 23, 2010

ROM THE UNITED STATES DEPARTMENT OF JUSTICE

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE TO THE PUBLIC:


Miley Cyrus, Disney darling, film star, creator of platinum-certified albums and pedophile jailbait will turn 18 years of age on Nov. 23, 2010. This, according to the United States legal system, makes her of adult age in most of the country. Additionally, she is further legally allowed to have sexual intercourse with any consenting adult, make adult videos and click the “I am 18” button on certain websites.

Upon sunrise of this day, it will no longer be considered “creepy,” “fucked up,” or “morally wrong and worthy of damnation” to 1) lust after; 2) fantasize about; 3) hope for naked pictures of; 4) listen to her albums in the dark by yourself; 5) take a copy of her autobiography into the bathroom for several hours; or 6) consider asking her father for permission to marry. However, as per the United States legal code, it is still illegal to stalk Ms. Cyrus.

Questions about the legality of behaviour toward Ms. Cyrus can be directed toward the “Former Disney Stars” Department at the United States Department of Justice.


THIS HAS BEEN A PUBLIC RELEASE BY THE UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT FOR THE BETTERMENT OF THE PEOPLE. GOD BLESS AMERICA.