Creepy Effeminate Dude Still Has Halloween Photo As Profile Pic

Story by Egon Sinclair 

| Published Jan 26, 2010

In stark contrast to his predilection for changing his profile picture at least twice during any given Facebook session, junior advertising major Tad Pillsburg has been staring luridly at online passersby from the same snapshot for nearly three months now, sources close to Pillsburg (but not too close, 'cuz he gets kinda handsy) reported.

Pillsburg's homemade costume, which he described as “David Bowie's digs from Labyrinth, if he was an '80s glam-rocker-goth,” has been his Facebook profile picture ever since it was uploaded from his mobile phone last Halloween. Despite repeated requests, no one else at the party was willing to take the picture, as the task required making eye contact with Pillsburg for more than a few seconds.

“I just like it... it's sexy, but dangerous, y'know?” Pillsburg commented, both in this interview and on the photo itself. Twice. And not by accident. “It's just such a good picture. I think the way it shows a little skin really turns people on.”

A random polling of people passing on the street, which included both genders and multiple sexual orientations, refuted every one of Pillsburg's claims, save for that the photo was, in fact, “a picture.”

“Why would he do that? Why?” asked sophomore fisheries and wildlife major Stephanie Valdez. “Seriously, did he need Batmanesque nipples on the costume? I posit that no, no he did not!”